Happy birthday…to me?

Today is my birthday. I am officially 27–or as I like to call it “rounding up to 30”. Yes, I know, technically 26 also rounds to 30. I didn’t say it was logical.

This morning, my lovely partner gave me my birthday presents. I was very excited because he had been talking about them for the past week, asking whether I was excited. I thought I was…until the first thing I pulled out of the bag was:

Yep. They bothered to come out with a special edition.

Yep. They bothered to come out with a special edition.

I was…confused. I mean, it’s a decent movie. In fact, I’m rather fond of it, even though it’s not a great movie. So fond of it, that I already own it. And he would know that, if he’d looked in the dvd drawer. I tried to act like I was pleased, but I failed miserably. He told me it was a joke gift. It didn’t seem very funny, but I was willing to let it go.

Trying to make the best of it, I examined the “Deluxe Edition” special features (I was underwhelmed).

T – “So, are you going to pull some of those tricks on me?”

Me – “What? Why would I do that? We’ve been together longer than 10 days…”

T – “Doesn’t mean you still couldn’t use them.”

Me – “I’m pretty sure if those tricks would drive you away at this point, we shouldn’t be getting married.”

T – “Yeah, but you could still get rid of me, you have enough time.”

Me – “Whaaa?”

T – “Because there’s 10 days left until the wedding.”

Me – “OHHHHHH!!!”

And then it was funny.

10 days left and I get to have presents like that for the rest of my life. Sweet.

The Secret To A Happy Marriage

Now, I know what you’re thinking, I’m not even married yet, so how could I possibly know that kind of secret? It came as a bit of a surprise to me, as well.

You see, I stumbled upon this secret in the most unlikely of places. A grocery store. What would a grocery store know about romance? Well, it depends on the grocery store, I’m sure. This particular grocery store is well known for having a bit of a different stock of items than most. In addition to having oodles of bulk items, it also has many gluten free products and even a few vegan ones. And it is within this frozen foodland that the secret was discovered.

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That’s right, chocolate covered soy-based ice cream bars are the secret to “a healthy, long lasting relationship”. I wouldn’t have believed it myself if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes. So there you have it folks. If your marriage is on the rocks, you’d better go out and get yourself some of these. Results guaranteed!*

* Results not actually guaranteed–not even a little.

I must admit though, they were quite delicious, and definitely a good ice cream craving killer. And a bit of a throwback to my elementary school days, when they’d sell revellos at lunch for $0.50. Those were the days! </end tangent> I rate them 5 out of 5, getting a 1 star bonus for entertainment value.

Seriously though, there is a secret to a happy marriage. I have no idea what it is, but it may look a little something like this:

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That’s right, it’s a penguin cookie jar. My dearest love got it for me for our anniversary. It’s functional, it’s adorable, and it’s a penguin. I can’t really ask for more than that.

If that’s not a happy relationship, I don’t know what is!

Have you come across any hilarious packaging? Gotten an awesome gift lately? Tell us about it!